I’m not

I'm not a tree
but I'm rooted
my branches don't always bloom
but they grow
sometimes I prefer to be quiet
but I still love to sing
and I may not often sway in the breeze
but believe me, I feel it

Piercing ~ Part 6

morethanablackcoffeegirl

Why did you not talk to me for those two years, Paul? she asks without falter in her voice. I thought we were heading somewhere. I thought we were OK, she says.

We were, he says, quickly putting his hands up in defence.

She shakes her head, So, then why? she asks again. Tell me why you chose to cut me out of your life – our lives together? Because the sad thing is, Paul, she takes a breath, which he welcomes. The sad thing is, she continues, Before we were anything else, we were friends. Well, I thought we were. You clearly thought different. And how you speak to me sometimes now, I didn’t think you could be so cruel. And to someone you once said you loved. Emily let’s that all sink in, before picking up her cappuccino.

Paul watches Emily take her time with her coffee, and…

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Piercing ~ Part 6

Why did you not talk to me for those two years, Paul? she asks without falter in her voice. I thought we were heading somewhere. I thought we were OK, she says.

We were, he says, quickly putting his hands up in defence.

She shakes her head, So, then why? she asks again. Tell me why you chose to cut me out of your life – our lives together? Because the sad thing is, Paul, she takes a breath, which he welcomes. The sad thing is, she continues, Before we were anything else, we were friends. Well, I thought we were. You clearly thought different. And how you speak to me sometimes now, I didn’t think you could be so cruel. And to someone you once said you loved. Emily let’s that all sink in, before picking up her cappuccino.

Paul watches Emily take her time with her coffee, and the delicate way she always turns the cup in one spot on the table. He knew, everything she had just said, was true.

You’re right. But, I’d do it exactly the same way again, if I had to, he says unapologetically, looking her in the eye.

choosing

one side, whole 
the other, hollow
together learning
and never giving up
together

choosing grit, dirt and light
to keep growing
to keep going
choosing to trust and to believe
as it clings on

This

this was the first
of sitting side by side
of smiling and holding one another
of clinging on to the inevitable
of what we both knew
that this was the last

Fade

your face is fading now
when I say your name
when I think of you

Wasted

you wasted
you threw
you turned
	your back

but

you wanted 
you grabbed
you held
	your track


you didn’t move 
        wouldn’t

relaxed, loose,
        yet wound tight

silently screaming,
        This isn’t me!
knowing that is 
        who 
        you wanted me to be


If I had let you

you made me nervous
to the point where I got lost
I forgot where - who - I was 
I wasn’t ready
I wasn’t ready to lose myself like that
not then

I wanted to ask for more time
but was afraid you’d get bored, get frustrated and run
so, my nerves increased, I bolted up and you left anyway

I was trying to figure it all out  
I still am

I wonder if you could have been patient
if I had let you  



away from

please don't say sorry
you did me a favour
you saved me

I'm not sorry
let's call it a blessing
we needed to save ourselves